Here is it fall again and all my teacher friends have gone back to work. I miss teaching–being with kids and having colleagues to share each day’s stories with, but now I have something I also value, my freedom. Yesterday we went to lunch with an old friend–something I never had time for when I was working full-time.

But I’ve learned something about myself since retirement. I’m not as disciplined as I thought I was. When I was punching the timeclock I was never once late to work and never missed a meeting. But since I’ve retired and don’t have to set the alarm…well, let’s just say I log a lot of jammy time. I still meet all my deadlines for writing assignments, but what I lack is the discipline to manage my time wisely, unless you count facebook and online games as quality time spent.

So I’m doing well with my non-fiction work. I keep busy with writing devotionals, short articles and educational pieces. But I’m floundering when it comes to getting down to work on my novel. I have a few chapters written and some idea of my main character and how her life will unfold, but I spend day after day skirting around the pile of stuff that is THE NOVEL. It scares me. I don’t know how to do it and I hate to make mistakes.

I used to tell my students that I wanted them to make mistakes because it showed me they were trying harder things. Blah, blah, blah. I am not able to take my own advice. I hate failing. So I’ve found something to spur me on. I joined American Christian Fiction Writers and have signed up for the novel writing group which helps me to set a word count goal for each day and with a mentor to cheer me on. Given my “other-directed” personality, I’m hoping this will be the cure for my procrastination.

We’ll see.